2008 is winding down

So I realized today that 2008 was coming to a close. I think it actually hit me as I was filling out forms to actually start getting medical insurance again. 2008 - the year of craziness and rash decisions - is almost over. I have to go back to the adult world, get things like a steady job and insurance, and maybe start thinking about things like my finances and my future and what-not.

Ever since February I have told myself that this is the year to go with every whim, try to be impulsive, and just enjoy living in the moment. Except for the many days of anguish as I think about "what is next? I am constantly living in a state of upheaval!" it has been a pretty spectacular plan for me. I have been happy with every rash decision that I have made. Which brings up the question: how long can I continue to do this and be happy doing it? Is it time for me to make decisions that would be longer-term (we're talking at least a year in length instead of the normal month-in-advance decisions I have been making lately)? Why do I have to stop making rash decisions?

My grandmother, aunt, and I spent a long time tonight sitting around the table just talking about life. As we were driving back to my grandma's, she told me that she thinks I am doing a pretty good job with my life, and that I would probably enjoy it more if I would stop fretting so much about the future and enjoy the now. It was so ironic - I mean - that is what 2008 is supposed to be all about!!! If this isn't my time to just enjoy the moment, when is?
I have always scoffed at people who say things like, "I am going to work really hard now so that I can retire early and enjoy life without worrying about the future." I think that is absurd, because you never know what the future will bring, how investments will fail, how savings will disappear, etc. Yet, lately I have been envying those people. Not because they are living for the future - I still think that is crazy in a lot of ways. But because they are planning a future. And, one lesson that I HAVE learned in my 7 months of working hard to live in the moment is that I actually like planning for things. Yet, the big wide open "future" does seem totally overwhelming to me. What is a healthy balance of living in the moment and still planning ahead? I don't want to keep being frantic because I have no idea where I will be living within 2 months. Yet I am not ready to give up the freedom of options that I value so much. I am actually not even sure how i WOULD give up the freedom of options.
Mostly it would be nice to stop thinking about these things all the time, blogging in circles, and go on to writing more interesting blogs. There are actually more interesting things to discuss in the world than me. Just how to get to that step...